Ring of Circles

You never left
But to me you are gone
I thought I was born to be in the center
But I was born to be outside
I’m the ring of circles
Empty inside more dust
Fall into the circle
Feather inside stone

Lights shiver watch me
As I become stone

Rings inside of circles
Feather inside stone
Rings inside of circles
Feather inside stone

Land taught me back
Beyond dry skin
Beyond survives
Nothing survives
Burn to the end
Flames in fire
Revenge the end
Drowned in fire
Sliced flesh a delight
A delight
Ten trillion lies on lies on lies
Burn to the end
Flames in fire
Revenge the end
Drowned in fire

A STAIRCASE
A FEARPLACE
AN EXIT, AN EXIT
AN EXIT, AN EXIT

Inside someone
Slither you new
Is a burn up
Is a burn up
Lonely is the shape
The circle
Shape the circle
Hollow hollow
I am balsa
In iron beam
Clock on a loop
Tail with string
Stitch against regret
Let’s sew skin
Arm to arm
The fat and the thin

A STAIRSCAPE
A FEARCASE
AN EXIT, AN EXIT
AN EXIT, AN EXIT

They told me
They’d teach me how to
Give you exit
EXIT, EXIT

I'M A STAIRCASE
I’M A FEARPLACE
I’M AN EXIT
EXIT, EXIT
I’M A STAIRCASE
I’M A FEARPLACE
I’M AN EXIT
EXIT, EXIT

Private Water

Here we are the final night 
The final night for you 
What’s abuse 
What’s abuse 
Just trying to drive my car 
4AM to get there to be used 
Escape 
It never came 
It never came 
I never came 
At least 
I’m being used 
At least I have a use 
A use for you 
A use for you 
A use to you 

You’re changing me 
I’m becoming 
I’m losing 
My discovery 
I’m using you 
To change 
To change me 

Swim in my private waters 
You are yours and you are mine 
Drink in my private waters 
You are yours and you are mine 

My fate to die 
I will die by my hand 
Is that abuse 
What’s abuse 
A state of mind 
A physical thing 
Come on now and tell me 
What’s abuse 
What’s abuse 
I call you names 
I say you’re a worthless shame 
You say you’re right 
Is that abuse? 

You’re changing me 
I’m becoming 
I’m losing 
My discovery 
I’m using you 
To change 
To change me 

Breathe in my private waters 
You’re not yours 
You are mine 
Sleep in my private waters 
You were yours 
Now you are mine 
Breathe in my private waters 
You’re not yours 
You are mine 
Sleep in my private waters 
You were yours 
Now you are mine 

You’re the fork in my river 
You split and divide my mind 
You’re changing me 
You’re changing me 
I’m losing me 
I’m losing 
I am the river 
A river in your sea 
Water inside the river 
Belongs in the sea 
Belongs with me 

Swim in my private waters 
You are yours and you are mine 
Drink in my private waters 
You are yours and you are mine 
Breathe in my private waters 
You’re not yours 
You are mine 
Sleep in my private waters 
You were yours 
Now you are mine

Heart.gif

We speak in odd meters 
Giving ourselves a pregnant pause 
A place to breathe here with you 
I don't want a sacrifice 
Or your touch or your life 
I just want to listen to you 

Inside 
Inside 
Inside 
Inside you 

Pry myself into my heart 
Pry myself it's the only art 
Try me 
I'm trying to be you 
Pry yourself into your heart 
Pry yourself it's the only art 
Try me 
I'm trying to be you 

Inside 
Inside 
Inside 
Inside you 

What did you say you wanted to kill? 
Who, what, why, when we will? 
Help me, help me still 
You want to affect people how 
Close your eyes open your mouth 
Help me still 

Inside 
Inside 
Inside 
Inside you 

Pry myself into my heart 
Pry myself it's the only art 
Try me I'm trying to be you 
Pry yourself into your heart 
Prey yourself it's the only art 
Try me I'm trying to be you 

I touch myself I can't dissolve 
Into the ocean I fall 
Where you are I swam with me 
I push my hands through my hair 
And swim back, back from where 
You are, I swam with me 

Pry myself into my heart 
Pry myself it's the only art 
Try me I'm trying to be you 
Pry yourself into your heart 
Pry yourself it's the only art 
Try me I'm trying to be you 

Trying to be you 
Trying to be you 
Sly me I'm trying to be you 
Trying to be you 
Trying to be you 
Sly me I'm trying to be me

Coming Down

how many of you have seen it? 
that thing standing there 
man woman descriptions 
ripples in the air 
  
turn your face in anguish 
recognizable sorrow 
that laughing threadbare hatred 
swelling for tomorrow 
  
-chorus- 
there’s a duality 
when they wield the knife 
the part of you that’s screaming 
whispered advice 
  
those of you i touch 
your cheeks so soft and round 
like late dewy apples 
rotting on the ground 
  
i wanted to see what i could be 
let me tell you what i found 
hard wood in my hand 
cold metal coming down 
  
coming down 
i’m coming down 
coming down 
i’m coming down 

in the orchards near me 
for fifteen years i’ve gone 
culled the sweetest tartest 
the great wasps circle round 
  
smiling at my island 
yah looking at your eyes 
you play such beautiful music 
in your bright disguise

Fear In The Rain

In my old garage   
below tulip trees   
wake or sleepy time   
it's all the same to me   

I want you to reach out   
haven't been in touch   
it's been two days   
it's been too much   

No don't rush it   
i really want to talk   
why'd you dye your hair   
you said I say too much   

Don't you understand   
what a lie means?   
You said you fucked forty   
by fourteen   

I am what I am   
You are what you are   
I'm not what you're not   
You aren't who you are   

I didn't want   
I didn't need   
I shouldn't have   
I don't deserve to bleed   

I know how you taste   
salty as the sea   
You're a real person   

I am just   
Fear in the Rain   

Let's make some   
rules for us   
what we can't do   
is us   

We must call   
we must write   
we must love   
we mustn't fight   

I never said   
what I did   
kicked Daisy down the stairs   
it was excellent   

Candy in my skin   
fills me up again   
tears the pink away   

cotton candy   
melts in the rain   
red fears wash away   

wash away again   
wash away in the rain   
and so do you

WHOLE

time to be me again  

My hole life  
I thought I was whole  
what I thought was wrong  
now my world is gone  

All these years  
I’ve wasted my time  
with all these feelings  
remaining inside  

Buried young one  
Child inside  
Rotting child  
Corrupted inside  

The Idiot’s Face  
is on your face  
Contorts and squeezes  
Distorts and bleeds  
The horror of ruin  

May all this pain  
go back to you  
May all this pain  
return to you  

May all my pain  
go back to you  
May all my pain  
return to you  

The hate from  
the past  
The child from  
the past  
The child from  
the past  

Made my reality at last.

My Little Problem

My little problem  
with feeling pain  
Every time I try  
it's not there again  

I have a way   
there is a way   
You’ll be the master   
You’ll be the slave   

I’ll be the one   
that takes it away   
You’ll be the one   
that gives you today   

Down from my eyes   
World alive inside me   
bright now capsized   
life I sent away   

On my little waters   
darker than the sea   
Master of all my feelings   
please protect me   

I will arise   
with or without what’s me   
Life won’t tread on me   
life won’t keep me still   

~  
I have a way  
There is a way   
You’ll be the master   
You’ll be the slave   

I’ll be the one   
that takes it away   
You’ll be the one   
that gives you today   

My little problem   
with feeling pain   
Every time I try   
it’s not there again  

I’ve bled too much   
for the weakest answer   
I have my life   
I have my mind   

In my life I’m living   
I don’t even want hope   
I want the sea to hold me   
I’ll just swim away   

~  
Life of waters   
One I never answered   
One I always needed   
One I put below me   

Why would I choose   
to discard my only answer?   
I couldn’t take it   
I still can’t at all   

If I had a loophole   
If I had the easy way   
I wouldn’t do this  
I wouldn’t drown it all   

~

HOLLOW

I lay real still
and closed my eyes
I breathed real deep
and said good bye

I'm not a dream
I'm not a lie
I know who I am
and I know why

In my sky
there's only ten stars
I know my name
I know who I are

I could not be my answer
while i was the I blamed
I had forgotten
all of my

Holding on my hand
I wanted to know
If I am a circle
am I hollow

THE WAY

i learned my experience 
was solely tangible

i have controlled my body
my mind
and my mouth
im on the wave

i am the wave
better than you
better than you
better than you
better than you

i have controlled my body
my mind
and my mouth

im on the wave
im on the wave
im on the wave
i am the wave

im on the wave
im on the wave
im am the wave
better than you

i hurt myself in front of you
i have to suffer

i want to touch myself
and feel

my mind my body

i am strong
im starting to feel

I FALL

Any way at all  
I will find a way to fall  
find the thing I need  
I destroy  
then I feed  

Respite I needed tonight  
love and stars I needed tonight  
find the thing I need  
I destroy  
then I feed  

I fall 
I fall 
I fall 
I fall 
I have found my way 
to fall

PHANTOM

they told me that I would experience the intangible 

that which could not be measured by my 
senses 

said I was just a body 
my body defined life 

how could I experience the intangible 
named 
emotion 

phantom phenomena confused this body 
phantoms don’t exist 

a means to create my phantom 
I’m going to make it exist 

extreme stimuli provoked my entity 
I found definition of my nature 

I embraced dissolution of my body 
I understand why I exist