Private Water
Here we are the final night
The final night for you
What’s abuse
What’s abuse
Just trying to drive my car
4AM to get there to be used
Escape
It never came
It never came
I never came
At least
I’m being used
At least I have a use
A use for you
A use for you
A use to you
You’re changing me
I’m becoming
I’m losing
My discovery
I’m using you
To change
To change me
Swim in my private waters
You are yours and you are mine
Drink in my private waters
You are yours and you are mine
My fate to die
I will die by my hand
Is that abuse
What’s abuse
A state of mind
A physical thing
Come on now and tell me
What’s abuse
What’s abuse
I call you names
I say you’re a worthless shame
You say you’re right
Is that abuse?
You’re changing me
I’m becoming
I’m losing
My discovery
I’m using you
To change
To change me
Breathe in my private waters
You’re not yours
You are mine
Sleep in my private waters
You were yours
Now you are mine
Breathe in my private waters
You’re not yours
You are mine
Sleep in my private waters
You were yours
Now you are mine
You’re the fork in my river
You split and divide my mind
You’re changing me
You’re changing me
I’m losing me
I’m losing
I am the river
A river in your sea
Water inside the river
Belongs in the sea
Belongs with me
Swim in my private waters
You are yours and you are mine
Drink in my private waters
You are yours and you are mine
Breathe in my private waters
You’re not yours
You are mine
Sleep in my private waters
You were yours
Now you are mine
Heart.gif
We speak in odd meters
Giving ourselves a pregnant pause
A place to breathe here with you
I don't want a sacrifice
Or your touch or your life
I just want to listen to you
Inside
Inside
Inside
Inside you
Pry myself into my heart
Pry myself it's the only art
Try me
I'm trying to be you
Pry yourself into your heart
Pry yourself it's the only art
Try me
I'm trying to be you
Inside
Inside
Inside
Inside you
What did you say you wanted to kill?
Who, what, why, when we will?
Help me, help me still
You want to affect people how
Close your eyes open your mouth
Help me still
Inside
Inside
Inside
Inside you
Pry myself into my heart
Pry myself it's the only art
Try me I'm trying to be you
Pry yourself into your heart
Prey yourself it's the only art
Try me I'm trying to be you
I touch myself I can't dissolve
Into the ocean I fall
Where you are I swam with me
I push my hands through my hair
And swim back, back from where
You are, I swam with me
Pry myself into my heart
Pry myself it's the only art
Try me I'm trying to be you
Pry yourself into your heart
Pry yourself it's the only art
Try me I'm trying to be you
Trying to be you
Trying to be you
Sly me I'm trying to be you
Trying to be you
Trying to be you
Sly me I'm trying to be me
Coming Down
how many of you have seen it?
that thing standing there
man woman descriptions
ripples in the air
turn your face in anguish
recognizable sorrow
that laughing threadbare hatred
swelling for tomorrow
-chorus-
there’s a duality
when they wield the knife
the part of you that’s screaming
whispered advice
those of you i touch
your cheeks so soft and round
like late dewy apples
rotting on the ground
i wanted to see what i could be
let me tell you what i found
hard wood in my hand
cold metal coming down
coming down
i’m coming down
coming down
i’m coming down
-
in the orchards near me
for fifteen years i’ve gone
culled the sweetest tartest
the great wasps circle round
smiling at my island
yah looking at your eyes
you play such beautiful music
in your bright disguise
Fear In The Rain
In my old garage
below tulip trees
wake or sleepy time
it's all the same to me
I want you to reach out
haven't been in touch
it's been two days
it's been too much
No don't rush it
i really want to talk
why'd you dye your hair
you said I say too much
Don't you understand
what a lie means?
You said you fucked forty
by fourteen
I am what I am
You are what you are
I'm not what you're not
You aren't who you are
I didn't want
I didn't need
I shouldn't have
I don't deserve to bleed
I know how you taste
salty as the sea
You're a real person
I am just
Fear in the Rain
Let's make some
rules for us
what we can't do
is us
We must call
we must write
we must love
we mustn't fight
I never said
what I did
kicked Daisy down the stairs
it was excellent
Candy in my skin
fills me up again
tears the pink away
cotton candy
melts in the rain
red fears wash away
wash away again
wash away in the rain
and so do you
WHOLE
time to be me again
My hole life
I thought I was whole
what I thought was wrong
now my world is gone
All these years
I’ve wasted my time
with all these feelings
remaining inside
Buried young one
Child inside
Rotting child
Corrupted inside
The Idiot’s Face
is on your face
Contorts and squeezes
Distorts and bleeds
The horror of ruin
May all this pain
go back to you
May all this pain
return to you
May all my pain
go back to you
May all my pain
return to you
The hate from
the past
The child from
the past
The child from
the past
Made my reality at last.
My Little Problem
My little problem
with feeling pain
Every time I try
it's not there again
I have a way
there is a way
You’ll be the master
You’ll be the slave
I’ll be the one
that takes it away
You’ll be the one
that gives you today
Down from my eyes
World alive inside me
bright now capsized
life I sent away
On my little waters
darker than the sea
Master of all my feelings
please protect me
I will arise
with or without what’s me
Life won’t tread on me
life won’t keep me still
~
I have a way
There is a way
You’ll be the master
You’ll be the slave
I’ll be the one
that takes it away
You’ll be the one
that gives you today
My little problem
with feeling pain
Every time I try
it’s not there again
I’ve bled too much
for the weakest answer
I have my life
I have my mind
In my life I’m living
I don’t even want hope
I want the sea to hold me
I’ll just swim away
~
Life of waters
One I never answered
One I always needed
One I put below me
Why would I choose
to discard my only answer?
I couldn’t take it
I still can’t at all
If I had a loophole
If I had the easy way
I wouldn’t do this
I wouldn’t drown it all
~
HOLLOW
I lay real still
and closed my eyes
I breathed real deep
and said good bye
I'm not a dream
I'm not a lie
I know who I am
and I know why
In my sky
there's only ten stars
I know my name
I know who I are
I could not be my answer
while i was the I blamed
I had forgotten
all of my
Holding on my hand
I wanted to know
If I am a circle
am I hollow
THE WAY
i learned my experience
was solely tangible
i have controlled my body
my mind
and my mouth
im on the wave
i am the wave
better than you
better than you
better than you
better than you
i have controlled my body
my mind
and my mouth
im on the wave
im on the wave
im on the wave
i am the wave
im on the wave
im on the wave
im am the wave
better than you
i hurt myself in front of you
i have to suffer
i want to touch myself
and feel
my mind my body
i am strong
im starting to feel
PHANTOM
they told me that I would experience the intangible
that which could not be measured by my
senses
said I was just a body
my body defined life
how could I experience the intangible
named
emotion
phantom phenomena confused this body
phantoms don’t exist
a means to create my phantom
I’m going to make it exist
extreme stimuli provoked my entity
I found definition of my nature
I embraced dissolution of my body
I understand why I exist